I have no groceries. Yesterday I was starving when I got home. I knew I had a bag of teriyaki rice in the almost cabinet. Have I mentioned that my apartment's kitchen has no cabinets. It also has no countertops. None. I am using office furniture (a desk and a secretary) as my cabinets and countertops. Anyway, I was looking on the secretary/cabinet and I couldn't find my rice. This left the seemingly never ending supplies of rice and spaghetti, two cans of vegetarian vegetable soup and a package of generic ramen noodles. Well, and there is tea and canned vegetables. That's all the food in my cupboard.
I turned to the freezer. It's empty. Even the ice cube trays were empty.
I look in the fridge. Cheese, cream cheese, the never ending supply of spaghetti sauce, the empty water filter pitcher, vodka, mudslides, bourbon, tequila, citrus vodka, and rum. Well, and some things I couldn't identify that my mom gave me two months ago that were hiding on the bottom shelf in their original tupperware containers. I couldn't identify them when Mom gave them to me... and so I never ate them. Also, the beginnings of a collection of condiments that all fridges get eventually: two kinds of pickles, mustard, ketchup, jalp. peppers....
So, I lamented the loss of the teriyaki rice. I knew I didn't eat it. Where could it have gone? Surely Boy wouldn't eat it. Boy learned that lesson yesterday when I screamed about the drinking my Sprite without permission. Boy isn't that stupid. Is he?
I called the last number listed on the Caller-ID. I found Boy. Boy admitted to consuming my rice. He apologized. Not very well, but he apologized.
I ate the ramen and sent boy to get me a bean burrito when he got home...
I think tonight will be another spaghetti night. I have been eating it every other day for two weeks now... and the box is not empty.
hmm...